Comments (3)

By Paula Marolewski, September 29, 2009 7:06 am

Frequently, I hear people praying something like this:

“God, if this isn’t your will, then shut the door. Just take it away.”

I challenge that type of prayer as a spiritual abdication of responsibility. We are not praying in that instance for wisdom to make a right choice about the situation. Instead, we are praying that God would remove the possibility of making a wrong choice about the situation. And that, to me, is passing the buck, and is the antithesis of spiritual maturity.

Will God sometimes close doors that aren’t his will? Yes. But should we count on him always to do so? Emphatically “No!”

Think of it in terms of raising a child. When the child is very young and toddling around the house, you do remove him from harm’s way. You literally shut doors on danger. He doesn’t know any better, and he can’t know any better. You don’t expect him to. He’s too young.

Now fast forward eighteen years. The child is now a young man. Would you consider him mature if you continued to remove all possibility of him getting into trouble or making a foolish decision? No. He is only considered mature when he is able to make a wise decision with all options open to him.

Don’t pray that God will remove the need for you to make a decision. Pray that you will have the wisdom to make the right decision.

© 2009 Paula Marolewski, www.SinkYourRoots.com

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• Debunking the Myths About Knowing God’s Will

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By Paula Marolewski, September 24, 2009 8:59 am

A popular question today in goal-setting seminars is “What would you do if you knew you could not fail?” And while that is an incredibly useful question, I have a harder one … and one that may be even more telling:

What would you do if you knew you were going to fail?

Or, put another way, what is so important to you that failure is no obstacle? What is the one thing you will seek to accomplish no matter how many times you fall down? What would still be worth the attempt, even if you knew beforehand you would never see the results you want?

Do you think those questions farfetched? Unreasonable? Consider for a moment …

… the prophets of God, who became laughingstocks, outcasts, and even prisoners because they dared to speak the Word of the Lord.

… the missionaries spending their lives on the field and never seeing the conversions they earnestly pray for, little knowing that they are sowing the seed and the next generation of missionaries will reap the harvest.

… the parents who pray nightly for their prodigal child, year after year after year.

I’m not saying that your dearest desires and deepest calling will end in failure. Far from it. In fact, if it is God’s calling, you actually cannot fail, regardless of the outcome here on earth. God brings an eternal perspective to the word “success.”

But the fact is, sometimes things don’t turn out the way we want on this side of heaven. Therefore, it’s important to ask yourself the question: Would I do this, even if it never turns out? Even if I never see any “success”? Would it still be worth it? If the answer is “Yes,” then that, more than anything else, is your purpose, your calling, your mission, your vision.

© 2009 Paula Marolewski, www.SinkYourRoots.com

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• Go Forward!

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By Paula Marolewski, September 22, 2009 9:09 am

Too often, I think we minimize or brush off our own hurt. Someone offends or wounds us, and even if they ask us about it we say dismissively, “It’s okay.” But it’s not okay. We’re bleeding inside, and our relationship with the other person has been damaged.

I believe we do both ourselves and the other person a disservice when we aren’t honest about the hurts we receive. Honesty is, in fact, a prerequisite to forgiveness – and forgiveness is the healing balm for both our wounded soul and the wounded relationship.

But being honest can be a tough proposition! So here are four guidelines to help practice healthy honesty:

• First, don’t assume the other person realizes that they hurt you. The truth is, we sometimes mis-communicate or are ignorant of the effect of what we said or did.
• Second, don’t point fingers. Honesty isn’t about lashing out and hurting or condemning the other person. Simply state what happened and how it made you feel.
• Third, keep to the point. Don’t bring up past wounds or mask the present problem with specious arguments. Keep to the current issue and deal with it.
• Fourth, don’t demand that the other person ask your forgiveness. Forgiveness must be freely asked for and freely given. Just do your part: be honest.

© 2009 Paula Marolewski, www.SinkYourRoots.com

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• Forgiving from the Heart

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By Paula Marolewski, September 22, 2009 9:00 am

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By Paula Marolewski, September 17, 2009 6:14 pm

Faith. A small word packed with big meaning. Consider how Hebrews 11 defines faith:

• Faith trusts what God has said. (Hebrews 11:3)
• Faith worships God in an acceptable fashion. (Hebrews 11:4)
• Faith walks with God in the normal, daily activities of life. (Hebrews 11:5)
• Faith acts despite the seeming “unreasonableness” of God’s command. (Hebrews 11:7)
• Faith leaves its comfort zone. (Hebrews 11:8)
• Faith is content with what the Lord gives, even though it may not seem “complete”. (Hebrews 11:9-10)
• Faith believes for the impossible. (Hebrews 11:11-12)
• Faith looks to the eternal. (Hebrews 11:13-16)
• Faith recognizes that we are pilgrims and strangers in this land. (Hebrews 11:13)
• Faith seeks for something beyond and greater than ourselves. (Hebrews 11:14)
• Faith does not turn back from discouragement, doubt, or despair. (Hebrews 11:15)
• Faith seeks for the best, the perfect of God. (Hebrews 11:16)
• Faith is willing to give up even what it loves the best: even what seems to be the promise itself. (Hebrews 11:17-18)
• Faith lets God be God; it doesn’t put God in a box. (Hebrews 11:19)
• Faith takes risks. (Hebrews 11:23)
• Faith takes humility over honor. (Hebrews 11:24-26)
• Faith is obedient. (Hebrews 11:30)
• Faith is willing to suffer and die for God. (Hebrews 11:35-40)

It is by grace that we live this life of faith. Make the above truth your own with this prayer:

By grace, through faith, I will trust in what God has said. 

By grace, through faith, I will worship God in an acceptable fashion

By grace, through faith, I will walk with God in the normal, daily activities of life.

By grace, through faith, I will listen to God and act on what I hear, no matter how “unreasonable” or “irrational” his commands are to me.

By grace, through faith, I will leave my comfort zone when called by God to do so.

By grace, through faith, I will be content with what the Lord gives, even though it may not seem “complete”.

By grace, through faith, I will believe for the impossible.

By grace, through faith, I will keep my eyes focused on the eternal.

By grace, through faith, I will remember that I am a pilgrim in this land, and heaven is my real home.

By grace, through faith, I will seek for something beyond and greater than myself.

By grace, through faith, I will not turn back from discouragement, doubt, or despair.

By grace, through faith, I will seek for the best, and not be content with less.

By grace, through faith, I will give up even what I love the best to God if he asks.

By grace, through faith, I will let God be God.

By grace, through faith, I will take godly risks.

By grace, through faith, I will accept humility over honor.

By grace, through faith, I will be obedient.

By grace, through faith, I will suffer and die for God if he calls me to that end.

Amen, and amen.

© 2009 Paula Marolewski

www.SinkYourRoots.com

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By Paula Marolewski, September 14, 2009 8:16 pm

A few thoughts today on what it means to cast all our cares on the Lord …

What are we giving to the Lord when we give him our burdens?

• Our worry and anxiety about the situation
• Our obsessive desire to think about the situation
• Our need to control the situation
• Our helplessness because we can’t control the situation

What are we not giving to the Lord when we give him our burdens?

• Our concern for the situation
• Our grief and  hurt caused by the situation
• Our responsibility toward the situation

What do we receive from the Lord when we give him our burdens?

• The internal, spiritual resources we need to deal with the situation
• The wisdom to identify our responsibilities within the situation
• The ability to rest despite the situation
• The peace of knowing that God is sovereign over the situation

© 2009 Paula Marolewski

www.SinkYourRoots.com

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By Paula Marolewski, September 10, 2009 10:02 am

I recently read Barbara Ehrenreich’s book Nickel and Dimed: On (Not) Getting By in America. It’s an excellent resource on the nature of poverty in America, and I recommend it. It made me want to run out and save the world … but I was instantly checked, because I don’t have the untold billions of dollars it would take to help all the poverty-stricken people in the world. A feeling of helplessness washed over me.

Fortunately, the words of Jesus recorded in Mathew 10:42 came to mind: “Whoever in the name of a disciple gives to one of these little ones even a cup of cold water to drink, truly I say to you, he shall not lose his reward.”

A cup of water. Now that, I can give. That might be a $20.00 bill from my wallet, a regular donation of groceries to the local food pantry, or an offer to provide childcare free of charge to a single mother. I can’t change the world. But I can change the world for a few people. 

Too often, because we can’t do everything, we do nothing. Don’t fall into that trap. Remember the value of a cup of water to someone dying of thirst.

© 2009 Paula Marolewski

www.SinkYourRoots.com

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By Paula Marolewski, September 8, 2009 10:38 am

In Romans 12:9, Paul states that “Love must be sincere.” Now comes the hard question … do we love with sincerity in the church?

We certainly preach love in the church. I’m sure of that. I’m equally sure that many non-churched folk accuse church folk of being hypocrites … so something isn’t connecting somewhere, and chances are it has something to do with love and not walking the talk.

It’s easy to point the finger elsewhere. It’s harder to look in the mirror. But let’s do it anyway.  Consider the following questions; you get a point for each time you answer “Yes”:

1. Did you ever say, “I’ll pray for you” then didn’t?
2. Did you ever resent someone else’s success or prosperity or blessing?
3. Did you ever say, “We must get together sometime!” and be glad it never happened?
4. Were you ever in a situation where you should have confronted sin, and didn’t?
5. Did you ever avoid saying hello to a new person in the church?
6. Did you ever gossip about people in the church … or outside of it?
7. Did you ever say, “How are you?” and not listen for the answer?
8. Have you ever been too proud to say, “I’m sorry”?
9. Did you ever refuse to give when you could have done so?
10. Did you ever turn a blind eye to someone else’s suffering?

The list of questions could go on and on, but we’ll stop at ten. How many times did you answer “Yes”? For each “Yes,” you are admitting that you lacked sincerity. You claimed to love … but you didn’t act it out.

Love is an action verb. We treat it like a piece of cotton candy fluff … “I love you!” “I care about you!” “I’ll be there for you!” … but it goes no farther than the words on the air.

God’s love is active. It is passionate. It goes the extra mile … right to Calvary. There’s nothing fluffy about God’s love. Nothing vague when he says, “I love you.”

Since we are to imitate God’s love, Paul states that “love must be sincere.” It’s got to be honest. True. Pure. Genuine. Which means it’s got to take action. In II Corinthians 5:14, Paul says, “the love of Christ compels us.” Do you feel compelled by love?

© 2009 Paula Marolewski

www.SinkYourRoots.com

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By Paula Marolewski, September 2, 2009 6:17 pm

My calendar has a beautiful quote on it by an unknown author:

“Today is a smooth white seashell; hold it close and listen to the beauty of the hours.”

It reminds me to slow down. To live in the present. To stop the rush, the hurry, the worry, the freneticism.

The only day you have is today.

The only time you have is now.

Slow down. Treasure the moment. “Listen to the beauty of the hours.”

© 2009 Paula Marolewski

www.SinkYourRoots.com

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By Paula Marolewski, September 1, 2009 10:02 am

Let me share one of the many items on my personal list of “things I have learned the hard way.” Ready? Here it is:

If everyone tells you that you’re wrong, you just might be wrong!

When I think of the trouble I could have avoided, the pain I could have been spared if only I had taken it to heart when people warned me I was making poor choices, it staggers me. So today, I simply want to pass on this hard-won bit of wisdom: if you are set on a certain course and people who know you and love you are concerned about the choices you are making, make absolutely certain to:

1. Listen carefully to them.

2. Examine in detail your reasons for making the decision(s) you are making. Be on the lookout for:

• Intellectual errors. I.e., Did you make a logical misstep somewhere? Are you making an unwarranted assumption?
• Emotional errors. I.e., Are you so emotionally wrapped-up in the decision that you refuse to consider that it might be wrong?
• Spiritual errors. I.e., Is your relationship with God on the downward spiral? Do you want something that is clearly outside of God’s will?

3. Share those reasons with the people who were giving you the warnings.

4. Listen carefully to them again!  

Sure – sometimes people can think you’re making a mistake, and they themselves can be mistaken. But, that being said …

If everyone tells you that you’re wrong, you just might be wrong!

© 2009 Paula Marolewski, www.SinkYourRoots.com

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